Father Windle and I have an ongoing joke about the lottery. Whenever the lottery gets very large, hits the news, and everyone starts playing it, I always tell Father, “Trust me, Father, if I hit the lottery, St. David Parish will not have a want or need again.” Father Windle always says the same two things back to me. First, he says. “Can I get that in writing?” Then he says, “Made a deal with God again?” I say, “Yes Father. If I win, making my life carefree without any suffering and worries, I will give a portion of my winnings to the Church.” Sounded like a good deal to me. A “win, win” for both parties. In reality, I forgot that I had already won the greatest lottery of all time. It is the reward that Jesus has given me: eternal life in Heaven with His Father — a treasure with no equal. There is a difference though. For us to claim this eternal reward we must give up the idea that we will be spared from all suffering and instead of being served we are asked to serve. We are asked to join Jesus in His suffering for this glory. When James and John hear this from Jesus in today’s Gospel, the apostles do what you and I are tempted to do when we hear bad news. They change the subject!
The Apostles, like us, are stuck in an earthly view of what Heaven is like and how to get there. We see the great people on earth as the rulers or the rich. In Jesus’ view, the servants are the truly great ones. Real glory doesn’t come from lording it over others, but from serving others. Jesus is most glorious in his crucifixion when he loses everything but love. What made Jesus’ sacrifice so special is that, inside of all the loneliness, darkness, jealousy, misunderstanding, sick crowd hysteria, coldness, and murder, he held out. He gave himself over, without bitterness and without self-pity, holding his ideals intact – to be gracious, respectful, and forgiving – without losing his balance, his meaning, or his message. He remained faithful to His mission and His Father to the very end. The struggle to do that, to remain faithful, is the real drama inside the death of Jesus. In the end, it is a struggle of the heart, not the body. He loves us through the worst to show what the best really is.
The Apostles do not know what they are truly asking of the Lord. What they are asking is whether they might be crucified with Jesus on either side of him. And here is the most powerful thing to notice in this story. Jesus does not rebuke James and John for their request. He grants it. They will drink his cup with him. We are all called to drink that same cup. It may be difficult at times, but like Jesus, we can go through life with love in our hearts and service to others. We can withstand all suffering and reap the winnings of eternal life.
May Jesus live in our hearts forever.
Deacon Chris